A New Beginning

I have always had what I call a very "plastic" brain; by that I mean a mind that slips easily between paradigms of thinking. I begin to see through the filter of those other ways very quickly without losing my ability to relate to my prior position. I think this natural flexibility of belief this is the true definition of what Shamans call "walking in different worlds" and is what caused me to gravitate towards the study of shamanism in the first place.
I still call myself a Shaman, because I see the term as the closest definition to what I have become, but recently, a series of personal changes (and choices) has left me at a bit of a loss in terms of a defining paradigm. Contrary to what you might think, and indeed contrary to how I would have thought about it before, I'm finding that it's just fine with me! I do not mourn the end of an "identity", I celebrate the integration of my many facets into a more complete and effective Human Being.
I'm still writing stories, with plans to publish them in E-book form in the near future, but you will find other information here too. I believe that those who need to find this information will find it. I hope that something about my own personal journey speaks to you, and helps you to unravel some of the mystery of your own Life.
Thank you for reading!
-Grace

(just a reminder, all material and stories are copyrighted)

Sunday, February 05, 2012

The Purpose Of Fear, or, as the Klingons say, "Today Is A Good Day To Die"

I am surely showing my Geekery with this post, but so be it!

Many years ago, there was an episode of Star Trek Next Generation which involved some kind of spacial anomaly (remember those???) creating a line of demarcation which was passing through the ship-almost like the ship was passing through some kind of veil.  You could see this line as a shimmering field that moved along the corridors as the ship moved forward.  Eventually, most of the crew members were cowering in the corner of 10-forward (For those unfamiliar with the series, 10-forward is the Star Fleet Equivalent of a lounge) as the shimmering wave came closer and closer.  I won't give away the end of the story- (AWWW  but GRACIE!!!!)  But I will say that it sparked a dream the night I saw it.

In my dream, I was with that group of frightened crew members, watching the "safe" and familiar space getting smaller and smaller and wondering what to do about it.  To the horror of my colleagues, I adopted a rather Klingon attitude and, figuring that if I was going to get squashed anyway, I would get squashed on my OWN terms; and chose to walk through the veil and into the unknown under my own power.

Oddly enough, that dream marked a turning point of sorts in my life and I began to examine how my attitude towards the fears in my life might be keeping me from doing the things I really wanted to do.  Now, bear with me a moment here while I explain something.

When you are experiencing a feeling of joy, like when you are doing something you love to do, you are emitting a vibration that is the closest your physical body can get to the pure vibration of your non-physical self.  You are more openly connected to that part of you which inspires you and which is best suited to guide you on the path to the you that you chose to come here to follow.  So, it can be said that when all your beliefs are arrayed to connect you to that feeling of joy, you are closer to being your true self.

All emotions are nothing more than a movement of energy through you (as it is said Energy-motion, E-motion), and all emotions emit a particular vibration.  They are designed to keep you aligned with that truest point- your "true North" of self-hood.  This is what is meant by the popular phrase "Follow your bliss", and the teachings of Abraham describe this as your "emotional guidance system", which is a good analogy in general.  They often say that when you do not feel good-for example, when you are experiencing fear, you are not "in alignment" with your true self.  When you *are* one vibration at your core level, and you are emitting another, non-compatible vibration through your emotions, you sense the discord.
The teachings of Bashar have a slightly different take on it (though they are really saying the same thing at the core).  The idea is, that you embody one vibration as your Higher Self, and when the physical "you", over time, adds layers of beliefs which are not compatible with the vibration of your higher self, you feel the discord in the form of fear.  So Fear, in effect, is the vibration of your Higher self as it is experienced when you hold certain patterns of belief (which are also vibrations).
Both of these views can be roughly compared to throwing two rocks into a pond.  Each rock will cause a certain configuration of ripples, but if the ripples happen to collide, the pattern is disrupted.

If your eyes aren't crossed by all this, read on!

So, if this is the case, it means that fear has a definite meaning and can become a tool for self-exploration.  When you are experiencing fear, you know you are holding a belief that doesn't "jive" with what your Higher Self knows is true about you (and your Higher Self knows a WHOLE lot more than you do-so trust it).  So your next step is to take a good, objective, look at what is happening and to ask yourself- "If I am attracting this situation to myself-or if what I am seeing in my reality is a reflection of what is going on inside my own head-what would I have to be doing (i.e. thinking or believing) to have brought this on?"  You are asking yourself, in effect, what beliefs would have to be in place, somewhere inside you, for this situation to appear as it does.  I usually carry a notebook with me.  As I experience a fear, I jot it down in the notebook, and when I get a moment, I look them over and decide which ones no longer serve me-and that would be pretty much all of them. ;)
Then, I choose to change the belief.  It's really as simple as that.  If the belief does not "come loose" at first, it's a clue to me that there might be another belief existing "underneath" that is supporting it.  With a little detective work, some meditation, and paying attention to how I feel, I usually get to the bottom of it very quickly.  I then write a line through the old belief and write the new belief in the book- "I choose to believe...".  The writing helps to "lock in" the new vibration with some physical reinforcement.
This is where some of you might use ritual, or mantra to act as your "locking in mechanism".  Whatever it is that convinces you that a change has occurred is fine so feel free to get creative if you are inspired!  Vianna Stibal, author of the book "Theta Healing" suggests that you envision your mind as a rolodex with each belief you hold written on a different card.  Then imagine the card with the negative belief being removed and replaced with another card containing the positive belief.
In this process, you are also transforming the energy of fear itself.  First, you create a sense of curiosity about what this fear is attempting to signal to you.  Then, when you have chosen your replacement belief, the curiosity becomes a sense of empowerment which puts you in closer harmony with your core being.  When you know that you have changed, your experience of what is around you will transform to be more representative of the new beliefs that you hold.

The Shamans of the tradition in which I was trained understood well the power of transformation, and it is said that every Shaman must undergo a kind of "death" in order to truly realize his potential.  Sometimes it is a death of old habits or systems of belief which no longer serve the Shaman in existing as the Being he was created to be.  We discover more of who we truly are through exploring the unknown- like what existed beyond the curtain on the Enterprise.  When I faced the veil of the unknown, I recognized it for the opportunity for transformation that it was.  In this "real world", I am no longer afraid of fear, because I know that it is a signal from my Higher Self that some examination is in order.  By facing it, I become stronger, and a more competent creator in my own reality.
As a Klingon in the dream, I said, as the Klingon warriors were famous for saying in the series, "Today is a good day to die", meaning that this was a moment in which I was being given a chance to transform myself for the better.
I took that chance.
My Life has been richer ever since.

2 comments:

Sonja said...

I love your practical suggestions, Grace (eg: carrying a notebook and writing down the fear-chatter of the mind)!
As a fellow traveler, I am however not agreeing in writing off all negative feelings as a "belief" though. Often it is simply a shroud that surrounds me with nothing attached to it (no reasoning behind the feeling). Since I often just "feel" the shroud, it tends to become part of me. My aim is to be able to take it of at will, like a shawl that has become too warm.

Aspiring To Grace said...

All emotions are generated by beliefs.
Let's put it this way, if I was to type:
2138jcjalo84
You would look at it and probably feel nothing at all because the comment had no meaning to you- you believed nothing about it. If you did have a thought about it, it would probably come up after you decided that the comment either annoyed you or amused you. If you were annoyed, your thought might be something like "Grace has gone off the deep end." But the belief comes first.

But if I were to write something that has a meaning for you such as, "Sonja is a very dear friend.", you would have an emotion about it because you either believed it was true or untrue. If you have no beliefs about something, you cannot have any feelings about it.
If you have a feeling, or an emotion there is always a belief underneath it-even if you don't see it at first.

It is also possible that part of your belief system that is supporting this "shroud" is simply that you believe there is a shroud in the first place. And I would also surmise that that belief is there to disguise other beliefs that are hidden beneath it.
It takes a little detective work, and a willingness to really *look* at yourself. I'm glad you want to take off the "shroud", but my question is, why would you ever *want* to put it back on again?