Because the Ego is continuously fighting for survival to justify its existence, it takes it upon itself to know everything- even when there is no information with which to form an opinion. Its need to be in charge is so great that it supplies "facts" to make up for the unknown elements of a given situation.
In other words; it just makes stuff up.
We are all involved in a constantly evolving story-line of our own creating.
This week, I had a first-hand opportunity to see how this can wreak havoc with my life.
It began with a flat tire.
Well, not completely flat, but on its way to that state. The car, however, belonged to a friend of mine, and they informed me with a sense of utter certainty that someone had let the air out of the tire; and that this act was done in an attempt to "get back" at my friend for something.
Not that my friend "believed" someone had done this, but that someone had done it.
I took a look at the event, the realization that one tire was low on air, and decided that it didn't quite add up to evidence of a malicious act. Why did they just take some of the air out? Why did they only do this on one tire? Wouldn't someone who was being truly malicious want to cause the greatest amount of inconvenience to their victim? Wouldn't they let the air out of all the tires-or, at the very least let all the air out of one tire?
But my friend was already caught up in the natural progression of thought which went something like this:
If one was to assume that someone let some of the air out of one of the tires, then there had to be a reason why.
The reason why was obviously something negative. They were trying to "get back" at my friend. They were unfriendly people. They were making a political statement. They were ignorant. etc etc etc....
That led to my friend to feel disliked, unsafe and threatened.
Now, hold on here. We do not actually know what really happened. But the owner of the car went automatically to the negative. Is the preferred state of being to feel unsafe and threatened? No, that certainly does not serve me.
Then why do it?
Well, it seemed obvious to me.
There was no reason to do it.
Knowing that people around me often reflected my own beliefs, I decided to take a look at myself, and Goodness, what a mess I found!
Turns out, I do the same thing on many, many subjects. Someone didn't return a text because they must be mad at me. Someone offered me a gift in order to buy me off in some way. I didn't get asked to a place because my company is not as enjoyable as someone else's. Someone didn't like my Facebook Post, I'm not as good as other people who post and get "liked".
Sheesh!
To show you what I mean, I'll take a specific entry from my journal:
Situation:
Someone didn't return a text.
Old Thoughts:
They are mad at me. I've offended them somehow. Other people probably get their texts returned right away. I bet other people get lots of communication. I am being excluded. I am less worthy. Something is being hidden from me.
Of course, none of this made me feel good about anything, in fact, thoughts like this often just brought me to tears.
So I continued;
It COULD be they are simply busy.
Perhaps other people are getting the same treatment.
Perhaps they have not gotten my message.
Perhaps they do not know how to answer.
They don't like to text.
They are having some quiet time.
The phone is not working.
I DO NOT KNOW WHY AND THAT'S OK
I release the need to know WHY-and I no longer fill in these blanks. The event is neutral and even though I do not, at this time, see how it will work out positively, I accept that it will and leave it where it is. The Universe is working hard to send me what I desire. I'm getting a handle on this and as painful as it is to face, I'm proud that I have figured it out and I KNOW I have the strength to face it."
There could be any number of reasons, NONE of which pointed to anything negative about me or how I was being treated, but the point is not really to assign some specific meaning (though positive possibilities feel better than repeating the negative ones), it is to remember that there is no inherent pain in any given situation. They are all neutral. The meaning they have is what we assign to them. Our physical mind is not designed to know and understand every little detail so stop forcing it to do something it isn't designed to do.
I went through my present thoughts and did a process like the above for every instance where I realized I was filling in the blanks for something I didn't know.
Even if you don't believe, as I do, that Reality is directed by your thoughts and vibration, why would you choose to suffer those negative thoughts before you really, REALLY have a reason?
And if you do agree with me about the nature of Reality, then you can see how putting out a vibe of negative expectation just causes those expectations to be realized.
Your mind is designed to take account of how things are happen-ING, NOT to determine how something happened or will happen. It is a great, in-the-moment interpreter, and that's all it's supposed to be. It functions best when we are in the present moment and there are many systems of belief that say the same thing.
Have faith that things happen for a reason, but don't knock yourself out or worse-make yourself cry, wondering what that reason is. Just remember that when the time comes for you to know, and it will, that everything will become clear; and that reason will always turn out to be the very best for you.
Whatever the actual reason behind the low tire, from my perspective it happened to bring another layer of myself to my attention so that it could be healed-and that turned out to be a very good thing.
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