Dog-gone.

I'm sure there is a reason for this, but frankly, that doesn't make it any easier.

Lately, I've been spending a lot of time trying some techniques for integration. (If in the unlikely event, you don't know what I mean, watch this:)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3V_Gtfr_YA&list=PLoME_J8FevCD481r3UzlI7tdd1i3WsqBt&feature=player_embedded



One thing that gets mentioned a lot is that while involved in a process like this, old memories come up; and the occasional suppressed memory tags along for the ride.
I'm an animal activist, and recently, Synchronicity has put two videos in front of my face, both about dogs and their bond with their owners when the dog becomes ill and must leave this life. One was about a dog named "Dukey" and another about a dog named "Shoep". You can probably find them online if you really want to.

As if *that* wasn't enough to make me cry-and it did.
A lot-
Continuously.
Emotionally.
You get the point...
I remembered something from my childhood.
I was not allowed to have pets as a child, though I wanted one desperately. I became close to the dog across the street, a yellow lab named Duffy, and I visited him almost every day. His owner, Mrs. Olen, was an elderly woman and she was always very kind to me.
One day, when I was about 7, I remember getting into my mother's car, with Mrs. Olen and Duffy in the back seat. This was unusual as animals were never allowed in the cars.
I have a very clear vision of looking over my shoulder into Duffy's eyes and asking what was going on. My mother said we were taking Duffy to the vet, and she wouldn't say anything else.
I don't remember a single thing about that day aside from those 3 minutes although I'm sure I must have gone to the vet and waited with my mother to drive Mrs. Olen (and presumably, Duffy) home but search as I might, I cannot recall it.

But I am certain now, because the feelings I felt watching these two videos were identical to the feelings I felt when Duffy suddenly wasn't across the street any more, that it was on that day years ago that we took Duffy to be put to sleep.

I think I disassociated from the grief I must have felt then, and guess what guys! It's coming up NOW in the aftermath of having come across those two videos.
Poor Duffy. Maybe if I had had the strength to remain focused at the time, I might have made his transition easier, I might have said goodbye, I might have had some closure.
But I didn't.

Just *why* this memory is apparently so important to relive isn't clear, but it's apparent that there is a lesson in there somewhere. What might you tell that child who was in the car, with a good friend about to die, and wasn't aware enough to be of any help?
It has been a really rough and raw couple of days-does anyone have any insight into this?

What Is All This Turmoil For Anyway?

The other day, a new friend asked me why so many people who were focused on the ascension process seemed to be going through such emotional turmoil.
I explained it like this:

It's a matter of density and how density affects reality. 
The world and physical reality as we know it are considered to be of "third density".  The less dense you become (going up the scale-we are in the process of moving from third to fourth density.), the faster reality responds to your thoughts.  So the process that appears to be emotional turmoil with regard to ascension is really the process of getting control of our own thoughts so we don't get stuck manifesting things out of fear when we become less dense.  We're peeling away the layers, discovering all the impediments to clear thought.  Huna calls this "cleaning out the tube"-meaning removing and healing all the thoughts and beliefs which alter our clear asking because you can have anything you desire to the degree that your belief system allows you to believe you can.

Take another look at my blog entry "Stop Filling in the Blanks".  In essence, it's about learning to recognize those hidden thoughts that come up in any given situation.  That's important.
Why? 
Because thoughts create emotions, and emotions create vibrations which, in turn, create your reality.
What do I mean? 
Imagine yourself suddenly at 4th density-a place where your thoughts manifest very, very quickly. Reality responds to your thoughts, so these hidden thoughts, such as "they hate me", "this happens to me every time because I'm not meant to succeed" and the like will be much more likely to come about for you.  You will experience situations in which you cannot succeed, and you will have experiences with people who act as though they dislike you.  If you hold a thought at this level like "I need a new car", but you ALSO hold a belief that goes "Nothing good ever lasts for me", what do you think will happen?
Well, you will probably get the car because you don't hold any belief that it won't come to you, BUT it will be likely to break down, or you may wreck it-whatever it is that fulfills your belief that it wasn't going to last anyway.
See?

(As a side note, if you're a Trekker like I am, as silly as this may sound, you can re-watch the Classic episode entitled "Shore Leave" to see an idea of what I'm talking about-or check out this link for a synopsis of the plot: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shore_Leave_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series))

Why do we equate this with emotional turmoil?

It's HARD to take a look at your whole self.  You're guaranteed to find things that shock you, beliefs that repulse you, thoughts that annoy you, disappointments, negative habits, assumptions that do not serve you, etc.  It's HARD to see these things, LOVE them, and accept them so you can change them.  It's HARD to admit that the biggest thing holding you back from all you desire in life is *yourself*.  It's HARD to realize that you had the choices all along, and HARD to be responsible for the ones you made.  And above all, it's HARD to realize that the only person who can change this for you is YOU.

So turmoil? Perhaps.
But certainly NOT a harbinger of doom.  It's just a necessary part of the ascension process.
What will you find when you begin to take a good look at yourself?
Well, I can only tell you this for sure; the first fear you have to eliminate is the fear to begin.

Namaste

What Good May Come Of It-A Father's Legacy

There is no delicate way of saying this.

My father was a crook.

And a recent reunion of 3 of his 6 children from 5 different mothers sparked a conversation about his life and how sad it was that such an apparently brilliant man wasted his intelligence and skills on a life of crime.

As a Shaman, I appreciate the lessons that we come to this Earth to learn when it comes to the larger picture.  I understand that, in Spiritual terms, my father's existence provides lessons and experiences that are unique to his children and what we do with those lessons helps us to realize who we are.  For that, at least, I am forever grateful to the man and his spirit for being there to teach me that.
Yeah.
Sure.
Right.
;)

But it seemed, on another, more "Earthy" and In-Your-Face level, to be such a sad waste of talent and potential for him to have gone the way he did.  My awareness of the "bigger picture" did little to soothe the hurt feelings of the 3 year old child inside me who became aware that there was something "different" about my history with respect to other children.  What my family avoided speaking about told me much more than the short, terse answers I got when I was old enough to start asking difficult questions.  It's hard not to assume that this somehow reflects on your worth as a person; especially for a child.
The mothers of his children have a particular point of view concerning their experiences with my father, and their opinions are, shall we say, less than complementary.
Before I met these men, my brothers, I was resigned to incorporate this vibration into my own being, and thought I had made peace with it all.  But as we chatted easily together, it became apparent that there might be a connection that transcended the common pain and chaos our father had caused for each of us.  As we exchanged the bits of knowledge that we had, and discovered more about this man, we slowly discovered things about each other that provided a different picture.

From my brother Joe, I learned that my father painted and had considered attending art school at one time.  Painting is a skill I discovered for myself only recently- it surprised me more than anyone, but it made sense to me that somehow I may have inherited this unknown talent in part from my father.

From my brother James, we learned that my father had studied law and became a paralegal while still incarcerated.  My brother James certainly inherited this practical intelligence and became a successful businessman who left a steady job to strike out on his own.  In the middle of a recession, he used his skills and knowledge as an engineer to build his own branch of an international company. He had the flexibility to accept and appreciate his two sons for the exceptional individuals they are, and they have flourished. 

Out of the 6 of us, Joe spent the longest time with our father in his life, and though he had more of a negative example, he turned it around and took away important lessons concerning family and responsibility.  He works hard providing for his 3 daughters in a way that our father never did.  He channeled his anger into martial arts, and is still well-remembered in relevant circles as a talented Thai Kick-boxer and instructor.  Joe balanced his physical existence with a deeply Spiritual side.  He takes pride in that, and so do the rest of us.

Though I do not know them as well, I can see that my father's legacy was not limited to the three of us.  My sister Marjory has a sense of aesthetic that rivals the most experienced interior designer.  She built a beautiful home for her family.
My sister Alicia, however, inherited our father's temper.  But, instead of turning those feelings into negative actions, she developed a sense of justice and outspokenness that we all admired.  Unfortunately, she passed away before I could meet her in person, but we did speak often by phone.  We both worked hard to put ourselves through school and we shared stories about those challenges.  Of all of us, it was Alicia who was able to stand up to our father and tell him in no uncertain terms just what she thought of him.  And though we may have cringed a little on the outside when she did it, inside we were all cheering her on for doing what we all wish we had the guts to do for ourselves. 

Of the 6, I know the least about George, who lives a quiet life in the mid-west with his wife and children.  He doesn't seem to feel the need to put what happened in perspective, nor does he seem to spend a lot of time soul-searching and sharing his experiences with the rest of his siblings.  Maybe our father, who was a poor Cuban immigrant, did what he did on some level in order to fit in with his ideal of the rich, successful American. Of course, what we do, we do because we think that it will make us happy, and it seems that, out of all of us, George has come the closest to realizing the kind of life that our father wanted.   George seems happy.  Without the glamor, without the glitz and showy possessions; he is happy.
Perhaps that's the greatest gift of all.

Looking at all of us through the lens of greater understanding, my brothers James and Joe and I realized that our father's life may not have been as much of a waste as we had thought.  Though there are many holes in the story that may never be filled in, we know that in terms of his children at least, there was a positive outcome to my father's existence.
I can know who I am, and be proud of who I am.  Partially because of it all, and admittedly partially in spite of it all-but nonetheless; proud of all of who I am; the negative and the positive.
And I have a great family.
I've said that before.
But until now I've never been able to say this;
Thanks, Dad.

The Gift. Happy Holiday's To All

An older story, but still relevant.  I hope you Enjoy it!



A little boy sat on the living room floor with legs crossed, deep in thought.
Colorful scraps of paper, glittering confetti and curling ribbon attached to pieces of Scotch tape lay crumpled and strewn in chaotic piles around his knees. He stretched out a slippered foot and sullenly kicked at a bit of the stuff, turning it
over with his toes. The call of discarded wrapping paper shown red, green and gold. It glimmered cheerily in the lights of the tree and the fireplace, but did nothing to brighten his mood.
Another happily squashed wad of paper landed nearby and the boy looked up to the source of the litter. All the other family members had already opened their presents, and how it was his mother's turn.

"Oh John! It's Beautiful!" she exclaimed with delight. "I have wanted something like this for just the longest time!" She held the box in her hands, lovingly pulled out the expensive bracelet inside and held out her arm to her husband who was
sitting next to her on the couch. "Put it on me, wont you dear?"
The diamonds winked and twinkled on her wrist as her hands moved across the various boxes and packages still arranged in neat piles within easy reach. One by one the festive wrappings were torn away to reveal their wondrous contents. There was a big, fluffy bathrobe with matching slippers in just that shade of blue that matched mother's eyes from sister Amanda. They sat on the boxes of matching note-cards, pen and address book from Grandma which were covered in pansies; his mother's favorite flower.
There were pearl earrings from Aunt Julia, and a new, fine leather brief case from brother Jim. At last there were only two items left. The woman smiled as she reached for a tall, square package; this one wrapped neatly in silver paper covered in blue stars. The box was topped with a loopy blue and silver ribbon so huge that it nearly covered the entire top of the box. The whole family oooooohed and ahhhhed over the magnificent wrapping; but that was nothing compared to their reaction when the box was opened. Inside the beautiful paper, swaddled in confetti and bubble-wrap, was a china plate.
This was not just any porcelain plate, but a very expensive and delicate one. It had cranes painted on it. Oriental ladies fanned themselves and strolled under blossoming cherry trees, across a bridge that spanned a lovely little river. Water lilies floated in the water, and their blooms were painted in colors so delicate that the little boy thought he could almost reach out and pick one. The inside of the plate was creamy white, and the rim was painted in gold that shone brightly in the light of the
fireplace.
"This is too much," said mother. She ran her hand over the edge, taking in the smooth coolness under her fingertips. She turned the plate over in her hands, watching the way the light played across the translucent finish.
"I have never seen anything so beautiful!" she cried. "This is the best Christmas ever!" She stood up and gently lifted the plate and placed it on the mantle in between a pair of silver candlesticks. She stepped back to admire it and smiled. Then she sat down once again and reached for the last present.

This package was different from all the rest. It had a bow made from many bits of different colored yarn that was tied around wrapping paper made from a brown paper grocery bag. Stars and swirls of color were drawn all over the paper in crayon; the artist seemingly determined to use every color in the crayon box. This box was not wrapped as neatly as the others; its corners were not perfectly crisp and the tape stuck out in places. Nevertheless, she lifted it gingerly into her lap and opened it with care.
Inside the rather sorry-looking wrapping was an even sorrier-looking item. It was a pot made of clay.
"What's this?" she asked, lifting the pot from its box and turning it over in her hands. "Is this for me?" The poor little pot was thicker on one side than the other and was painted with bright yellow and orange flowers that could only be described as "noisy". The rim of the pot, if indeed the pot had a rim, was painted blue with yellow spots. There were thumb-prints dried into the bottom and it didn't sit quite straight on the table. It leaned to one side in a way that looked
to the little boy as if the clay had partially melted.  Mother held it out at arm's length, blue eyes scanning the lumpy clay. "Did you make this for me?" she said, smiling to the little boy.
"Yes", he nodded looking nervously at the floor. He had spent a whole afternoon on it. His eyes traveled to the mantle where the china plate sat, gleaming regally.
"But it.s not very good". He said.
"Not very good?! Well I think it.s wonderful." Said mother. She reached out and ruffled the boy's unruly hair. She carried the little pot to the kitchen where she placed it on the table. It wobbled just a little, but otherwise stayed put.

In time the holidays passed as holidays do, and the little boy grew up as little boys do. Through the years, the beautiful china plate with the cranes and ladies on it stayed on the mantle; and the little boy.s mother dusted it once a week. When
people visited, she always took them to see the mantle where the plate stood between the candlesticks.
"This is my beautiful china plate", she told them. "I got it for Christmas but we mustn't use it. It's much too delicate." The company nodded solemnly and moved on.
When the children grew up, and left to start families of their own, Mother and Father decided to move to a smaller house. The beautiful china plate was lovingly and carefully wrapped up in its bubble-wrap and confetti and placed into the new
attic along with the candle sticks, and other boxes filled with photo albums and baby clothes that had long been outgrown. When the little boy, who was not so little any more, came to visit he found the old, lumpy clay pot filled with apples
and sitting on the dining room table. The noisy little flowers were faded now, and somebody had glued a little piece of cork to the bottom so that the pot no longer wobbled. "I didn't think you had kept this", he said thinking sullenly back to that morning with the tree and the china plate, where was that plate anyway?
He looked around.
No plate.
"Oh dear!!" Mother laughed. "I don't know what I'd do without my little clay pot!"
She removed the fruit and turned the pot over lovingly. "It still has your little thumb prints here all over the bottom! This pot used to have all my paper clips in it. Do you remember when it sat on Father's desk?"
The young man nodded.
"And I planted grandma's pansies in it, before they got too big in the Spring."
She went on, "And last Summer we filled it with sand and used it to prop open the
screen door! I kept my gardening supplies in it this Fall and it held down the paper
on my desk when I was working on the Christmas cards. Last week I had it filled
with pens and pencils by the phone! This pot has been the best present I've
ever gotten, and you made it for me all by yourself!"
The young man smiled and put the pot back on the table. He took a bite out of an
apple, then, whistling happily, he followed his mother into the kitchen for something to drink.

On Meditation

"Many people think that meditation is the process of training the mind. I prefer to think of it as a process by which we learn to percieve with the heart without the conscious or unconscious judgement and self-editing of the human mind. When someone says "keep this in mind", I think "Take this to heart" because I think that the heart is really the seat of Human intelligence and the key to global consciousness."
-Grace Gemini

Faith

"It is inconceivable to me that a Universe in which anything is possible could present us with a life full of challenges without also giving us the means to overcome them."
- Grace Gemini

Positive Thinking is an oxymoron

A dear friend on Facebook posted this article:

http://www.salon.com/2012/11/25/positive_thinking_is_for_suckers/


 I was moved to post an answer, then again inspired to post it here.   Enjoy!

 ***********************************************************************************
The assumption that all people are at the mercy of their cyclical, negative thoughts with no hope in sight is very typical of Western brain-centric ideology. I agree that to approach the concept of happiness from that perspective is an uphill battle on wheels.
However, from a Spiritualist perspective-my perspective- thought exists to be used as a tool to generate the feelings of happiness that we aim for. This is why affirmations don’t work for most people. We can stomp across a stage or read positive statements til we’re blue in the face but if we don’t feel them; and more importantly train ourselves so we carry the positive feeling until it becomes habitual, they won’t work to make us happy. The less effort; the better. This “short circuits” those ruminant patterns of thought that can sabotage us. ( meditation is a great tool in helping individuals break these habits)

Author Gregg Braden has a very interesting story about his visit to a Tibetan Buddhist Monastery where he asks the abbot t about the importance of all the paraphernalia around the monks during their prayers. He was told that all the accoutrements are meaningless since they exist to generate the feeling, and “The Feeling is the Prayer.”
http://unslavedmedia.net/unslavedmedia/watch_video.php?v=Y4YKNMSAAOA8 (check around timer 8:18)

A good book that approaches this subject is called “The Heart’s Code”, by Author Paul Pearsall. Pearsall describes the American belief in the superiority of the brain, and puts forth a very convincing argument that it is just this kind of “positive thinking” that keeps most of us from the happiness we seek. He states that for most Americans, any kind of sentiment- and by that, I mean what is felt, not purchased from Hallmark- makes us very uncomfortable.

Happiness is effortless.
This is not to say that it does not take some focus to get there. Those who achieve it are those who have conditioned their "ambient thoughts" to a place of neutrality and acceptance-with a healthy dose of your Buddhist "non-attachment".

Where modern Spiritual seekers run afoul of concepts like the Law of Attraction, “Motivational Speakers” or The Secret, is by

1) Aiming for something that they think will make them happy (instead of aiming for the happiness itself)
2) assuming that it is the words alone that will give them the outcome they desire.

Therefore, Secret behind the Secret, and what I think Burkeman is saying here, is that what you are, in effect, reaching for (though “reaching” may be too active a word in this context) is the feeling of well-being in spite of the prevailing circumstance. When you are already enjoying the feeling, suddenly the outcome doesn’t mean as much.
Whatever gets you there is irrelevant.

For Those Of You Who Are Becoming Real

FOR THOSE WHO ARE BECOMING REAL:

 “Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’

‘Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.

‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’

‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’

‘It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
― Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit


 
All higher consciousness asks the same question; “Who are you, What are you?”
To answer this, we often begin by applying the appealing qualities of others onto our self-image like a patch on a pair of jeans.  This is who I am.
When we realize that, in spite of our efforts, those parts we emulate in others remain outside ourselves, we begin to search for the qualities that are truly embodied within ourselves.
Sometimes we discover within us the same facets we admired in others; and sometimes not.  But we always feel a little silly when we realize that we have lived life in its most superficial sense.  It is exhausting, because we are taking unto ourselves, the weight of those things that do not belong to us.
There is no shame in this.
We are designed to learn through our associations with others.
It is your experiences that teach you-words do not teach, connections teach.  When you are waking up, and carrying only what truly belongs to you, other connections do not drain you, and you suddenly realize how important those connections truly are.
They become your wings.

 

You Don't Have To Like Me

You are under no obligation to like me.
You don’t have to like everything I do.
Feel free to like only some of the things I do, or some of the things I believe, or think or feel.
Or none of them.
You can organize and categorize every aspect of me, and pick and choose from any column and in any combination.
You can completely customize your vision of me, and then you can toss it all back and choose again.
You can like most of me, some of me or none of me. It’s your choice.
You can like me, or you can like what you think I am.
You do not have to know me at all.
It doesn’t matter.
Though what you think about me may, temporarily, peripherally or superficially cause me some sadness, it doesn’t make me a bad person.
In fact, it says nothing at all about me.
I choose whether or not to hold onto that sadness.
I release any need to have anyone choose anything in particular. I relieve you of the responsibility of pretending.
I do this because *I* like me.
I can do this because I know who I am.
I can do this because I take responsibility for my own happiness.
I know that happiness is a choice.

How much happier would you have been if you could say the same to your friends; your lovers? To your family?

In All Growth There Is Some Pain

Many people ask me why there is such pain involved in Spiritual Growth. The answer is simple, though difficult to hear;

In order to experience yourself as what you are, you must first experience what you are not.

This is part of the duality of the Universe and even Einstein was aware of it when he conceived his theory of relativity. In order for something to know itself, it must have something

to compare itself to.

In order to understand something in this Universe, there must be a starting point, and a point of comparison. To destroy something, it must first have been created. And to create something, it must be able to be created from a point of “being-not”.

In simple terms, this means that in order for you to know that you have the power of creation within you, you must first create. In order to create yourself, you must first un-create yourself. So what you were, must first be destroyed in order for you to create it.

Got it?

This is what is meant by the “Alpha and the Omega”, the beginning and the end. The two are connected and dependent on each other.

“But if I am a part of God, how can I not be what I am?”

I’m glad you asked that.

You can’t.

But you *can* forget, and in coming to this physical Universe to know experientially what you had previously only understood conceptually, you did just that. We are here to experience the process of coming to know who we are (or not), and to make the choices (or not) that lead us there.

This is why, what we experience is termed “re-membering”, because we are becoming again what we were. We are re-joining the whole of All-That-Is (which previously was “All That Was” until we added to it).

You exist.

You choose.

You emerge (here)

You experience

You destroy

You create

You remember.

You already know.

I’m just here to re-mind you.

On Repeating Numbers

 I've seen so many sites and it seems that a whole lot of people have put a whole lot of time into "defining" just what these numbers mean-books, websites, pamphlets, angels, specific meanings, blogs. wow.
Some of the "meanings" aren't really that positive from my perspective, "Your agels aren't with you" or "brace for change"-and sometimes that brings me down; so I decided to do it this way;
I told the Universe that coming across repeating numbers is simply an indication to me, sent by my higher self, that I'm ON THE RIGHT TRACK.
Thanks to all those people who spent so much time and effort in breaking it all down, and I'm sure that it works for them, but I'm not going to worry about what 9's mean, or if I prefer 3's to 5's-if I see them, I just know I'M DOING THE RIGHT THING, and I smile.
I have noticed that since I decided that, they are coming up a LOT more often!
I think I did the right thing.
:)

When Life Gets Rough, Remember Why You Are Here.

You’re here to *learn* things.

Not to know things.

That’s a very important distinction.

You’re not here to *know* lessons-you’re not here so that this information magically appears inside your head.

...

It was the *process* of learning that was important to you, with all it’s delays, issues and effort and pain. Have faith that everything you experience is a part of that learning- the reason that you are here.

The journey *IS* the destination. So relish it.

If you're brave enough...

"Forgive yourself all of your past actions and mistakes. Decide that loving yourself is the most important thing in the world-make the decision that you will no longer accept abuse from anyone, even yourself. Decide you will no longer use others to punish yourself. Then see who leaves your life-and who stays."
-GraceGemini

"Real Love doesn't save you-it cheers you on while you learn to save yourself."

-Grace Gemini

After today's request for emergency healing for a friend's cat

"Hey Grace, "THE CAT" JUST ATE!! yeahhhhhh....i just got done cleaning her face and eyes and giving her meds. the swelling on her face even looks a little better... AFter her meds, she groomed herself as usual, cleaned her face and then curled up and is sleeping peacefully now...thank you so much for all you help.. Wow,..."

YAY!

On perfection

"If someone tells you that a relationship is perfect for them "in spite of the shit", then it's not perfect. If they truly thought it was perfect, it wouldn't even occur to them to say "in spite of"."

-Grace Gemini

True Teachers

"The greatest Teachers do not say "Worship me". They do not say "Follow me."
The greatest Teachers said "Be LIKE me."
They are not interested in creating "followers", they are creating EQUALS."
-Grace Gemini

Fear

"Fear is what takes us out of the present moment. When you are afraid, you are thinking about something that has happened, or worrying about something that may happen.
When you are out of the present moment, you are off your path. Your mind will play tricks on you. The rational mind will begin to search for reasons and evidence to support the fear it feels. You become reactionary instead of responsible.
Don't worry about this, it happens from time to time. You are always able to stop, take a breath and re-focus on the present moment. You are always able to begin again."
-Grace Gemini

Truth and Lies.

When people lie, it often stems from shame, fear or guilt. Shame comes because we can't, or won't except the truth.  Fear occurs when the truth is something we might not want to hear.  Guilt happens when we expect that the truth will hurt another.

But the problem is that all words carry energy; lies, especially so.  Even if the person being lied to does not know on a conscious level that they are being lied to, they do feel it; and that energy eats away at the foundation of the relationship.

So, step into your truth.  Take responsibility for the choices you've made.  Act and speak with integrity.  Do not focus on the opinions or actions of others.  Letting go of dependance on the feelings of others brings you freedom.  You will no longer be bound by the fear of loss.  You will be free of having to maintain the lie.  You release the shame that comes when you know you have not acted properly.  You will be liberated from the fear of discovery.  You will be free of worry about who knows what information and you will have no potential shame at being "found out".  You will no longer have to pile lies on lies to maintain the status quo. 

Be equitable with others, but above all with yourself. And be aware how a torrent of suppressed "truths" about another may in reality be unresolved issues you have within yourself.  Understand how our "rational" minds can often deceive us.  Being honest is about allowing ourselves to feel vulnerable.  As with all paradox, this contains great power for transformation because only then are we genuine in our dealings with others; and only then can we change resentment into connection.

Not all who Wonder are lost.

"Sometimes in life you feel as though you have lost.
But that is never the case. You never, ever lose. Eventually, the Universe will show you that it was listening all along.
The thing is- you just don't get the things you thought you wanted, you get the things that you didn't know you needed- and were already there. You just couldn't see them for what they were, but they were already there.
If things are cleared out of your life, or inaccessible, they are that way for a reason. Have faith that what comes of it will be even better than you imagined and you won't even miss what you thought you lost."
-Grace Gemini